I am exactly where I am supposed to be.

I have officially been on this trip for a month. Many people told me that this trip would be a life-changing experience and that I would “find myself.” At the beginning of my trip, I set no expectations and I didn't want to count on self-transformation. I thought finding myself was a tacky concept and I instantly thought of eat, pray, love.

Call me tacky, but as I was driving in the car the other day [because that’s what you do on a road trip] I was thinking about how I am truly finding myself. I think that in order to find yourself you truly have to lose yourself, in the sense that you have forgotten completely who you are. I think that this was personally both a terrifying and refreshing realization. I have been given the opportunity to rediscover who I am and determine who I would like to be.

When I was in Portland everyone was weird, accepting of others, and knew exactly who they were, or who they were striving to be. This was an envious moment for me because of where I am in my life: confused about who I am, no income, no apartment, etc. However, this experience in Portland gave me hope.

It took losing my hair to stress-induced Alopecia and a multifaceted life-altering experience for me to realize that I need to start putting myself first and focusing on my well being: emotionally and physically.

As I drove along the California Coast I smiled a bit [if you know me this is not something I normally do, I suffer from RBF] at the thought that I can be who ever I want to be and no one is relying on me to be or act a certain way.

Julia Roberts makes finding yourself look really easy. From what I remember, she eats expensive delicious food and has a steamy romance with a hunky man, but it’s not really that glamorous. I make a joke that I am on a granola bar diet and I’m lucky if I get a shower.

I firmly believe that nothing worth it in life come easy, it takes hard work and patience. While I was in Wisconsin, my aunt asked my younger cousin if she thought I was sad. My cousin said that she thought I was sad, but I was exactly where I was supposed to be. So even when I’m not smelling my best or I’m a little hungry I still believe that I am exactly where I am supposed to be.