Impostor Syndrome
Hello there, I’m back!
It was brought to my attention that the last time I updated my blog was nearly two years ago…if I procrastinate this post another month and a half then we will have successfully reached the two-year mark (yay!!!). It’s not that I don’t enjoy blogging; I honestly love writing and sharing my inner thoughts/ideas with anyone willing to listen. I suppose life got the better of me, and I started prioritizing grad school papers over anything that brings me enjoyment (WARNING: grad school does that). There were many times since 2019 where I wrote content in my head, and stress caused the monologue to magically poof from my mind. So this is me putting out into the universe that I will do my best to contribute at least one blog post monthly.
Starting us off with a cheery topic: Imposter Syndrome 😅😅😅
What is Impostor Syndrome? It is that feeling you get when you walk into a room full of people you perceive as highly accomplished, and you wonder: What the hell am I doing here? I don’t belong…I’m not good enough…What do I have to contribute? Simply put, it is the feeling of inadequacy or lack of competence. It is questioning your abilities and feeling like a fake. We all experience Imposter Syndrome at some point in our lives. And yes, even the ego driven person has felt like a fraud. Their need to prove themselves most likely comes from a deep rooted feeling of inadequacy. This experience of imposter syndrome is one that is far too familiar for me.
How does Impostor Syndrome develop? Along the way, navigating my life path, many people questioned my capabilities. Teachers, family, peers, partners, and strangers. Eventually I started to believe the negative ideas being projected onto me. I gradually took on their role of questioning my abilities, to the point where their services were no longer needed (we truly can be our worst critics). I adopted the belief that I was inadequate and had nothing of value to contribute to others. This then manifested in all areas of my life, attracting what I believed I deserved: mistreatment. So how did I crawl my way out of the pit of despair?
How do you address Impostor Syndrome? I wish I could give you a quick fix, but as you know the healing process takes time…and is never truly complete. To address Impostor Syndrome, it is important that you start believing and truly recognizing your worth.
Here is a place to jump off from:
Try personal affirmations! Cognitive behavioral therapy has a strong focus on reframing our negative thoughts. Whenever negative thoughts or beliefs come to the surface, try using positive affirmations. Example: You enter that room full of people you perceive as highly accomplished, and when the automatic thoughts of self doubt present themselves, try stating to yourself: I am worthy. I deserve to take up space. I am competent and accomplished. I have value to contribute to the world.
Have a conversation with a close friend! This may sound strange…if we are not yet able to recognize our worth, ask a friend what they value about you. Ask them what they notice as your skills. Allow those around you to hold space for your worth, even if you are not ready to take that on for yourself.
Reflect and give yourself some damn credit! Like I said before, we are our toughest critics. Take the time to reflect on all that you have accomplished and the hard work it took for you to get where you are today. A symptom of Impostor Syndrome is the need to always be striving for the next accolade. If you are a recovering achiever, it’s safe to assume you don’t always take time to marinate in the accomplishment. Pause and relish in your achievements. Your resume doesn’t equal worth, but the ability to give yourself the credit you deserve does play into self-worth.
Do more of what empowers you! Identify areas in your life where you feel confident. Practice these empowering tasks more often to build self esteem. Continue to build your self esteem in other areas of life as a way to find confidence in areas you are still unsure about.